God

So, I was reading this little book about God to Nina. My atheist-agnostic friends would say I'm indoctrinating her, and I am. I was indoctrinated, and it's nice in life to have a base to operate from.  People I know who don't have that seem adrift. Not that I've never been adrift- I have been when I've let myself drift away from God.

I feel like I question Him, and the things I grew up being sure of, more than ever. Sometimes nothing makes sense to me.  But's that's OK- it's the blaming God for our messes and eventually abandoning Him that's the problem. This little book I read talked about how throughout history people behaved the worst when they turned away from God.  Of course some would argue, look at all the horrible things people have done to one another in God's name- that, of course, is true. (The Westboro Baptist people come to mind.) What we do pretty much speaks for itself. Good is obviously good- evil never is, although we can be tricked by it at times.

I keep thinking about how so many of us are adrift these days. The book I read Nina was written in the 1930's- the author referred to people who were bad as the stupid, lazy ones. These days, it's so easy to get sucked into the world of technology and entertainment- things that make us stupid and lazy, and in the end, aren't important at all.  And we have become so selfish and self-absorbed-  we think we can do and say whatever we like- niceness and goodness is going away, and being replaced by crudeness and thoughtlessness.

I have been on both sides. I know how differently I feel when God is far away from me.  Or I should say, when I am far away from Him.  I know that when I am close, things that are beautiful seem almost holy to me.  Music and art and nature make the most sense and I want to wrap myself up in them and hide from the din of the rest of the world. They become little glimpses of Heaven.