Rockin' the Cowboy (Hat)

So, on vacation this week I felt like my Red Sox baseball hat wasn't giving me enough protection from the sun.  I think about things like this now that I'm Middle-Aged- I'm worried about skin cancer and wrinkles.  (I wasn't worried about them when I probably should have been, so I'm sure the damage is already done.)  I asked Big Al if I could run into a women's clothing store on the way to the beach and grab a new hat.  I was secretly hoping they'd have one of those straw cowboy hats- I had seen this cool chick in one at the pool the day before, and hoped that if I wore one maybe I'd look kind of cool and somewhat younger.  Or at least people might think I'm fun and young at heart.

He pulled up to the curb- I told him I'd only try one store and I'd be quick.  They had a lot of hats, but I narrowed the choices quickly down to two because the rest all seemed to be things that older women (like me) would wear.  One was a cowboy hat.

I texted Big A pictures of the two possibilities.  He likes when I text him from women's dressing rooms-  it titillates him slightly to be allowed into the inner sanctum, even though he knows I will probably ignore his input and get what I want.  I asked him to choose A or B:

 A.

B.

He picked A. After I had already paid for it. Right answer!

So, I hopped into the car and donned my new hat and looked at myself in the little sun-visor make-up mirror.  I was immediately filled with self-doubt.  I remembered the episode where Liz Lemon tried to unsuccessfully "rock the cowboy hat."

I thought- this hat isn't going to fool anyone! I'm not cool! I'm not young!!  I'm wrinkled from too many years of not caring about the sun damaging my skin.  And from being alive for such a long time. 

I asked Big Al- Does this hat make me look like I'm trying too hard? And he said, Borderline.  But it makes you look fun. You'd look great wearing it with a tight t-shirt at a concert.  (Right answer, again!)

I don't completely trust Big Al's opinion when it comes to me. His hazy, middle-aged vision and love prevent him from seeing me clearly sometimes.  But I think that's actually a benefit of being with someone for a long time. Everything gets a little softer and hazier, like those old vaseline camera lenses they used to shoot the ladies with in movies from the '40's.  Things aren't such a big deal. It makes reality a little easier to take.

So, I rocked my cowboy hat all week.  And I felt pretty darned good.